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A Birthday

Today my little brother Jeff turns 28.  Or was it 27.  I forget.  I won’t see him on his birthday.  I didn’t last year, or the year before that.  We used to be as close as siblings could be, but things changed.  Jeff changed.  And I am not good with change.

He’s still a good person. He calls our mother more often than I do.  He buys my grandparents extravagant gifts that I can’t afford.  He makes an effort, but it’s not the same as it once was.  Things happened.  Life happened.

I miss my baby brother, but realize our relationship won’t ever be what it once was.  And I’m finally at a place in my life where I’ve accepted that.

Comments

  • I hear you on “Things happened. Life happened.”

    I don’t think I have spoken to my sister on her birthday in 4 years.

    We’re twins.

  • This is pretty much how im feeling right now.. except with my older brother.. you know the one.

    I can’t really accept it though.. im still waiting for him to once again enjoy my company and look at me as a friend.. not just his little sister.

  • i don’t get to see my siblings very much. i can’t imagine not keeping in touch with them though. and i don’t think my parents would allow it. there would be some smacking around if we had issues!

  • I can relate so well, because things have changed between my brother and I – and it was painful and difficult for a long time – until I accepted it.

    But there are still times I miss how things used to be.

  • Dear Sarah,
    You need to partake in the wine and a pantless night. Your last few blogs are well… SAD! DEPRESSING! DREARY!
    Perk up ol’ girl! There are drinks to drink and pants to take off and vibrators to use!

    COME BACK!
    Signed,
    Worried In Wisconsin

  • I totally understand what you are going through. It’s very difficult to deal with sibling issues. Some days I’ve accepted things for the way they are and other days I wonder why things have to be the way they are.

  • Me and my kid sister aren’t very close either. We never really were though. I hate not having a close sibling like most people do. She’s the only sibling I have and lately I’ve been making an effort to be a larger part of her life.

  • I am in the same situattion with my younger brother. I haven’t seen him in years though…he contacts me sporadically, but that’s it. It’ll never be as it once was; it just is what it is. Sad but true.

  • I don’t have a relationship with my older brother but there’s a long and winded history as to why. I don’t feel any loss though since we were never close, even as kids (he’s a bit older than me). I am sorry though that you’re not as close as you once were. That’s a bummer to have a relationship change and not necessarily for the better.

  • I am exactly 11 months difference from my brother. We get to be the same age for 23 days. But I don’t know a thing about him lately, we spent most of our lives being friends, even enemies when we were friends. It is so hard, unexplainable. But what can you do…

  • I have four brothers that I rarely talk to, but four sisters with whom I’m close. 50/50 I just don’t have a lot in common with my brothers. Maybe some day your circumstances will change, but it’s good that you’ve accepted it for what it is (or isn’t) today.

  • I understand. I am exactly 11 months difference from my mother. He and I were once so close, till the unfortunate buzzard of change happened. :-( I no longer reside within her belly, and in this separation, we lack what we once shared — true communion. I often miss the brush of her prickly mustache upon my bosom, and long for the day when we will perchance meet in a crowded street, sewage tank, or hot air balloon.

    :-/

  • Baby Brother Jeff

    Your right Sarah we were really close. I made some mistakes and I am eternally sorry. The sad thing is that it could be the way it used to be if we both made the effort. The only problem is that WE don’t make the effort. Your the best sister anyone could ever have. I LOVE YOU TONS, BUT MISS YOU EVEN MORE!!

  • Sometimes it’s hard staying so close to the ones we love so much as the reality of life often steps in and drives a wedge between the bonds once held so closely. Luckily a strong foundation usually weathers the turmoil and rebuilding is possible. Much love to two of my favorite cousins.

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