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As I continue my education, I also continue making an ass of myself.

As usual school is kicking my ass. I’m struggling to balance work, school and personal hygiene. This morning I was in such a rush to leave the house that I didn’t brush my teeth. Shut up. That’s why Baby Jesus invented gum.

I realized my transgression halfway through my first class. While rummaging through my purse for gum I felt something that didn’t belong. Much to the surprise of my classmates I pulled out a giant cucumber.


Rather than explain it was from my mother’s garden and going to be my lunch I just kept my mouth shut. I knew I’d somehow end up talking about tossing a salad, AND there’s just no recovery from that. So instead I threw the cucumber back into my purse, unwrapped a piece of gum and continued taking notes because that’s the kind of Monday I’ve had.


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