Today someone asked me if we had a name for the baby. Silly question, since I have named basically every inanimate object I’ve ever owned.
“Of course we have a name! Right now I’m calling her Goddamn Fetus, but we are thinking of changing it in time for her birth.”
At that moment I realized I am a monster and shouldn’t be allowed to procreate, but at least I’m a funny monster to some. Just not the person I was speaking to at the moment. But oh well, you can’t win over everyone.