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Compassion? What's that?

I’ve been living the life of a pioneer for two days. I’d kill for a pink bonnet! Luckily, my power was restored just in time to catch up on Google Talk with my friend Dave while in Peru. The jerk travels more than Ben clips his toenails. I kid you not!

David: So I thought you might be amused to know that I have managed to develop some kind of infection right in the middle of my trip.

me: No way. Chlamydia again?

David: It started in my throat and is spreading to my lungs right now. Syphilis this time.

me: So full blown aids? I’m sorry

David: I’ve got Beastman Jungle AIDS!

me: Will you live long enough to spread it to others? Do your part, man!

David: I’m gonna try to reduce the population as much as I can while I still have time!

me: Al Gore would be so proud… there’s really no better way to conserve natural resources than to kill off the population one STD at a time. You’re such a martyr.

David: Perhaps there will be 78 virgins or whatever waiting for me in heaven when I die.

me: I think God and Al Gore owe you at least that…

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