If your driver license has expired and you’ve been too busy to renew it, bar hopping is a bad idea.
Carpet burns are better on your elbows then face.
Broken toes hurt.
Men from Holland bounce their heads way too much.
When you talk shit on someone and then make your girlfriend stick up for you, you are the one who should be kicked in the baby. Even if you are my brother.
Lemonade and Southern Comfort doesn’t make me barf.