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Old Man AK

Today, AK turns 40. Yes, 40. He’s an old fart, but a beloved one.

AK and I met ten years ago when he moved to SLC to work at the company I where I was employed. I was soon to become his work wife, much to his wife Mrs. AK’s dismay. Not because she was jealous, but because she felt sorry for me. The dude cannot remember where she keeps paper towels. I don’t live with them, but I can tell you where they are kept–IN THE SAME FUCKING SPOT FOR 8 YEARS, that’s where. He also cannot remember that I am in charge of everyone and everything, and he is not. He’s very easily confused. Obviously.

AK and I shared an office for a few years and it was then he became the older brother I never had. He teased me mercilessly for things that should not matter. Who cares if I add a ‘s’ to street names? Foothill(s) Blvd. is in the FOOTHILLS it should have an ‘s’. He also forced me to listen to Toad the Wet Sprocket all day, every day. And did you hear? The band broke up in 1998.

AK and his family quickly became some of my favorite people, and not just because they fed me and kept me in wine. I couldn’t ask for better, more supportive friend in my life than AK. I can’t imagine a life without him, and luckily I don’t have to. We’ve been through a lot together, and I wouldn’t be the person I am without his influence in my life. I love him for that.

Happy Birthday AK! I’m sorry you’re soooooo old, but it could be worse… you could be RLO.


  • This post will make his big four O bday even better! Happy birthday indeed!!!

  • Loving the “you could be RLO” part… I have no clue why, but I found it to be hilarious!

    Happy Birthday to your friend, AK.


  • Good friends are hard to come by, I’m happy you have some.

    Tell AK 40 isn’t so bad. I’m 42 and I’ve found age is relative.

  • I hit the Douglas Adams number myself this year, and I’m still trying to remember what the question is …

    But that has more to do with the answer than the age.

    40 is the new 30. 30 is the new 25. So I’m just 27.


  • Happy Birthday AK! You always leave great comments on this site.

  • Ha! I thought I was the only one who knew about being a “work wife”. :) Good times…

  • Happy birthday old man AK!

  • 40 is not that old. 40 is when men are perfectly seasoned and just right. Plus, 40 is when their social maturity is sufficient to allow them to date 30 year-old women. 40 really is the new 30.

  • Thanks Sarah! you’ve always been a great friend.

  • finally. didn’t you spend your gift card on a walking stick?

  • I like AK. Upon introduction, the first thing he said was not hello, it was, “Is this the one we have to keep away from the forklifts?”

  • I’ve just recently stumbled upon your blog and your twitter. And you are now a hero in my life for figuring out that an entire bottle of wine can fit into a nalgene bottle, that is GENIUS!

    But I work in the music industry, and I hate to tell you, that for some reason unknown to anyone, Toad The Wet Sprocket is still around. Like still playing shows around. It’s disturbing.

  • Happy birthday to your friend.

    I found your blog via Dooce and love it but my productivity level at the office has decreased.

    You have a way of making the most mundane things interesting. Keep it up!

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