Not everyone is well versed in the Mormon faith. I grew up in a Mormon family, and I’ve discovered there’s a multitude of doctrine and church history I don’t even know.
I assume that has something to do with me ditching church to go skinny dipping in the river with boys.
One of the things I do know is that I’m not allowed into the Mormon Temples. It’s a sacred place for active members. I have no idea what goes on in there, but I’m guessing it’s something religious and not just a bunch of people in white watching the newest episode of “Rock of Love Bus with Bret Michaels.”
When I found out I could take a tour of the newest temple before they dedicate it I wanted to go. And who better to take me than my Jesus-loving BFF RLO.
“RLO, are you busy Friday night?”
“I am. What’s happening?”
“DAMMIT. I want to go to the temple.”
“Don’t laugh. I’m serious RLO.”
“I don’t think anyone has ever written ‘dammit I want to go to the temple’ before.”
“What did you want to go for?”
“I really, really, REALLY want to go. And think about it, when else am I ever going to get into a Mormon temple?”
“Oh, so you want to see the Draper temple before it’s dedicated. I’m sorry, but I can’t on Friday.”
“So it’s your fault I can’t go to the temple. That’s just mean.”
I begged RLO to change his plans and take me to the temple, but it didn’t happen. RLO doesn’t love me enough to take me to the temple. I’ve made a point to say that very loudly to him each time we are in public. I’ll shame that jerk into taking me to the temple eventually. I don’t know why he won’t agree, I already promised him I would behave and not take a flask.