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The one where I wish I could punch the pharmacist

“I can’t sell you this Sudafed.”


“You don’t have a barcode on your driver’s license.”

“Are you kidding me?”

“I’m sorry; there’s nothing I can do. People make drugs out of this stuff.”

“Um, it already is a drug. One I need.”

“I can’t sell you full strength without proper state identification. You’re going to have to buy the regular strength.”

“Would it help if I cried?”


“What if I tell you the elevator/airplane/vertigo diagnosis the Internet gave me. Would that help?”

“You’ve already told me twice and no, it won’t help.”

“Would it help if my panties fell out of my purse? It happened before you know.”

“Miss, I really need to help the other customers now.”

“Fine, but I really don’t think this is what they meant by crack ruins lives you know.”


  • Were you wearing your “I heart Meth” t-shirt? Because pharmacists don’t get irony.

  • It’s ok that your DL is missing the barcode, because satan stamped yours on your forearm. Have him scan that. Pharmacists are not know for their problem-solving skills, clearly.

  • I had this issue almost 6 years ago when the ban 1st started. i was 6 months preggo and sick as all get out. I was in Walmart at 1am dying for relief and the store manager wouldn’t budge on it at all. This was because Nebraska was one of the first to impose the law on it. I was so pissed, sick and preggo I didn’t care that I was making a scene inside the store. I would blame the hormones, but lets be honest I was just mad. Yet another reason I really hate on meth heads.

  • Yeah, and forget the “PE” (fake-stuff.)You might as well eat M&M’s to make yourself feel better. They don’t work. When is your license up for renewal? We don’t have Barcodes here in PA, but a magnetic strip like a credit card.

  • When I met you at blogher I didn’t realize you were THIS Sarah. I didn’t look at your card till later and then I wanted to kick myself. You are one of the first bloggers I stumbled upon when I started writing. I’m so glad I got to meet you even though I didn’t know it was you I was meeting.

    Sheesh – I make a good impression, don’t I? : )

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